update

I feel like there is so much to write about. A little over a week ago I joined up with Infinity at Clarksville. Clarksville was one of my camp sites last year. When I got there there were so many returning campers who ran up to me and hugged me, parents who felt an extra comfort seeing a familiar face. When the older boys ran over to me and wouldn't leave my side, it was exactly what I needed. I needed somebody to want to be around me as much as I wanted to be around them. Its amazing how God can play tricks on you. I knew I was going for me, to go have fun, and be nosey about the team but he was really preparing my heart for what was to come. He was teaching me and telling me to get my head back on, straight this time.

I miss camp but I know I'm not supposed to be a part of that team. I'm supposed to be where I am. As much as I may want to disagree with God and ask really or why I accept where I am. I believe the people that have been placed in my life recently are there for this season in my life. See Monday when camp was over I pulled out my phone (it was so relaxing not to have it all day) I had 4 missed calls and a text from my mom. My grandfather was in the hospital. I told the staff and left. I headed home after a long day.

My grandfather wasn't expected to make through the night, but he did. He continues to make it, we continue to wait. Watching while every breath may be his last, trying to go on with life, when your heart skips a beat everytime I hear my parents ring tone. It doesn't make life any easier. I may not know the answer to why.

I dont know the answer to why Corey was killed. 5 days ago 3 guys i grew up with were in a wreck, one died. The other two are thankfully alive and are going to be fine. Its hard to see a young friend in a casket and knowing that in a couple of weeks you'll prolly have to bury someone who has lived such a long and richful life.

No matter what we go through we can't fully understand what someone else is feeling. All we can do is be there for one another and support one another. We look for God's strength because our only is simply not enough. We also forgot the most important part of life and that is to live and to love. To live like it were your last moment yet love others as if they were leaving you in the next moment.